Silence They Say

The Betrayer and the Betrayed

I lost all trust in that moment. I saw him with his new girl. It was all a lie! How could I have believed any of it after all that time had passed? I felt like an idiot and most of all I was the one who looked like a fool not him. He told me this wouldn't happen straight to my face and I believed him. I let it drag on and on over the months and deep down I knew it was over but how could I let those kinds of feelings go? I need to just let it go, but how can I when he betrayed my trust and turned me into the betrayed? Let me start my story from the beginning:

I don't know how but I fell for him. I was truly in love and I was only 15. We talked about everything and anything. We would spend our hours talking about anything. He met my family and most importantly my father. He went to most of my basketball games just to watch me play. I really thought things couldn't get any better and I suppose that's why they got worse. I spent three months of my life with that guy just to watch as he left me behind with all his lies he had told me.

My life had been going good. I had a good guy in my life or so I thought. He really did mean a lot to me he was everything. I mean just to make matters worse; he was my first boyfriend and my first kiss, the first guy for me to introduce to my dad. He meant a lot but after what he did to me, I could care less about him. How could all the feelings he said he felt for me just disappear? It just amazes me that he could lie straight to my face and walk away without feeling a single drop of guilt.

My jaw dropped and my heart fell apart at the words he was telling me. "I have to, I have no choice." This was the reason he gave me for leaving me. "My grades are low and I was told to break up with you, I can't have a girlfriend as long as my grades are low" he told me. "Ok I understand" I said as I walked away with tears on the verge of falling to the floor. I understood that he couldn't have me for a girlfriend until his grades improved. So I thought to my self I could wait for them to improve.

Then the lies continued because oh yes his grades went back up but no he didn't come back to me. Instead he told me that he wasn't allowed to have a girlfriend at all until the next school year. Again he crushed me, not because of his words but because of what they meant. To me they were all just a huge lie. As I said though, I was in love. I had my heart on him and my head couldn't control my feelings. So again I waited, I waited a whole school year on him and I know when I look back at it now that was the most stupid thing I could have done at that point.

It turned into my sophomore year of high school. A whole year had passed and he was stuck in my head. I still can't believe I had let a year of my life pass by like that. I was truly miserable. I had completely shut down guys in their tracks once they tried to get to know me. I had feelings for only one of them and he wasn't staying true to his word and I wasn't leaving. After a while I just felt like he was using me. Just going to other girls and once he got bored of them he would come back to me because he knew I would still be there by his side. I couldn't take it anymore but I didn't do anything about it.

Then I finally believed he was going to come back to me. I had heard some rumors that he was secretly missing me too. "I still like you" is what he came up and told me one day. I couldn't believe it, all my waiting around had finally paid off because my babe was finally going to be mine again. I was ecstatic that whole day and everyone noticed. I was back to my old self. When I look back now it feels like I was set on autopilot for a year and that makes me feel sad to think about.

I thought we were getting back together. One day I saw him at school and with him was his new girlfriend. I was so disgusted. I knew once everyone saw him with her they would think I looked like a big fool. After I stayed by his side for that long and even offered him another chance. Now I have to see that new connection between him and another girl every day. At first I couldn't stand the thought of coming to school and seeing them kiss. I told my friend, "I can handle holding hands and hugging, but once I see them kiss, that's just going to crush me!"

Then one day I saw them, kissing. I felt like running away to just lay down somewhere to cry! I was crushed I had never felt that much pain. I think it really did help me to move on though. That's what I did when I saw that. In that single moment I had the courage to move on I lost all fear about how a guy might rip a hole through my chest again. I went home and I didn't go lie down and cry I continued on with my life. I let things be. My favorite part is that I actually started talking to my guy friends again and now I'm getting closer to one of them. I really feel like I can be in a relationship with him and not have a constant fear burdening me about being left with a broken heart again.

My Twilight......Continued

                         

My new proposal for another episode in Twilight is simple, Edward doesn't come back. He stays at whatever place he lives now. Instead Bella has to learn to face facts and accept that Edward is not coming back. What happens is, after all the time she spends trying not to forget Edward, Jacob is trying his hardest to keep her happy. His hard work pays off because instead of Edward coming back, she falls in love with Jacob. Edward never comes back, but Victoria does. My story continues into Bella and Jacob's older years, when they have a child together.

They have a daughter together and this child attains the werewolf powers like her father, because her mother never got her wish of being transformed into a vampire. My story starts off in a part of their lives when their daughter, Riley, is just about to turn 15. She finally finds out, the hard way, that her dad is a werewolf. The reason she finds out is because she was taking care of Bella while she was sick. Just like in Bella's younger days, she begins to talk in her sleep and even yell. What her daughter hears is something she was never supposed to find out.

Her mom is asleep and while asleep she is sleep talking. Bella is screaming at the top of her lungs that she stills loves Edward and she doesn't care if he won't turn her into a vampire. She also screams that Jacob is not the one she has always truly loved deep in her heart because she has never loved a, werewolf. Riley was bringing up a cup of tea for her mother and once she hears the last part she stare goes blank and her hand slowly loosens on the grip of the handle, and then it crashes to the floor shattering into a million pieces!

Bella wakes up at the sound but does not understand what happened and why poor Riley has a dead stare. "What's wrong?!" Bella asks. Riley doesn't reply and she suddenly looks angry. Then at that moment she looks at her mom and looks very angry. She feels angry because somehow all these years she has known. Now she knows it for a fact, she is a werewolf. The first female werewolf in the history of Jacob's ancestors.

Now Riley can't help it she bursts out of her clothes as her teeth and nails grow much larger than normal, and hair is sprouted all over her body like her father Jacob and her ancestors before her. She has now turned into a werewolf in front of Bella's own eyes. Now that she is a werewolf, for the first time, she has no control over what she is doing. If you have seen the Twilight Saga New Moon you know that werewolves only show up for one reason. Only if the vampires are back in their territory.

Riley has turned into a werewolf because, Edward is back! Jacob was also in the house when Riley had gone through her first transformation so when he showed up he instantly knew why she had transformed. The only problem that he was in the older generation of werewolves so he couldn't transform too. Bella had no idea why this had happened to Riley, until she saw how tense Jacob had gotten.

Just then Edward peers through the window and Riley sees him. All of this, Riley transforming, Jacob running upstairs and Edward peering through the window happens in a matter of seconds. In the next second though Riley flies through the window and tackles the vampire to the ground. When she stops to look at this strange new creature her heart races and she has gently transformed back into the normal Riley. The vampire who stands before her is not Edward but a new young male vampire and in that moment, Riley has imprinted* on a vampire.

*A Twilight term: For a werewolf to fall in love instantly for the rest of its life.

My Bravery

"Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen (Curchill,Winston)."

My dad is a firefighter. I had to be brave when I was about 8 years old when the Bosque caught fire. He had to go and help even though he wasn't on duty and it was a risk that could have taken his life. My little sister had just been born too. I had to be brave, which I thought in my mind, because my mom was scared too. Well he had to go risk his life and that means that he has to have a lot of courage to face that kind of situation! This fact is what made me feel like I could be brave too.

I was just re-living this memory because yesterday, 04/05/10, the Bosque was set ablaze again! This time my dad was on duty and at the fire station on Griegos. He was really close to where the fire was and I still don't know if he was sent over there to help put it out. I just remember looking out to the city and watching as the smoke rose higher and higher. The only thought going through my mind is if my dad was ok. I got a horrible feeling in my stomach because I was worrying so much. Then school ended and I looked out on the city and the smoke was spread out further and bigger. My stomach dropped at that point.

I knew I had to brave when I got home because of my younger sisters. Their 6 and 4 years old and I didn't want them worrying about our dad at work. It should just be a job not a burden. My mom had to go to school so I was watching them both for the night. They wanted me to take them closer to see the fire but I didn't want to put any thoughts into their heads about something going wrong. I just told them that dad would be home in the morning just like he always is. I also said that nothing bad was going to happen to anyone, that the fire was going to be taken care of and everyone would be safe.

I had those thoughts of "What If" in my head all night long. I was stressing so much about the whole ordeal that I was exhausted and I fell asleep easily (surprisingly). I also successfully completed my task. My task was to keep my sisters clueless of any thoughts that would make them worry. I am glad that they got a good night's sleep too. My head was very worry free. Now the morning has come and gone, and my dad is at home where he is supposed to be. My little sisters have no idea what he went through, as far as fighting the fire. All my worries are gone because my dad is now safe at home. The fire is also being better controlled now too.

All of my family worries are gone and I don't have to be brave anymore for my sisters because there is no reason to be. I know this is not your typical act of bravery in terms of external, "dragon slaying", bravery. This was more of an internal act for me. I had to be mentally brave to face what most people would never have to. I know that my dad was brave because that is a courageous thing to do. To go and risk your life to save others, even strangers. I think this is why I am brave too, because I learned it all from him. I hope that the people he saved are thankful and understand the severity of the situation.

"Firemen never die, they just burn forever in the hearts of the people whose lives they saved (Murphree,Susan)."

                                         

The Time Machine

If I had a chance to create a time machine and go back to any time or place I would go back to the time of when my parents were younger. Specifically when they met in high school is where I want to go. I would do this because I haven't really gotten the whole story of what went "down" when they first met and fell in love. I hear bits and pieces of it, not the whole thing. I should have known about this stuff since I was little but I guess they don't really like to talk about those things. I don't know why this is.

There is a new movie that has just premiered that is called "Hot Tub Time Machine". In that movie a group of people go back in time but only about a decade or two back, so it's not that far back in time but it's still considered time travel. This is what I want to do, just go back enough time to meet my parents when they were meeting each other. I want to see what their young life was like. I have heard a couple of stories from my mom here and there about when my dad used to have girls falling for him. Then my parents found out that they were going to have a child. I want to go back to that time to see what it was like for something that serious to happen to them.

I know for sure that when they met it was in high school. West Mesa High School is where they attended to be exact. My mom was a freshman and my dad was a senior. This is why they like that I come to Atrisco because there are no seniors for me to fall in love with. Another big thing that I know for sure is that my mom found out she was pregnant with me when she was only nineteen years old. Yes, she was a teen mom. If I was there I would ask her how she feels about everything because that would be very hard to find out your having a child at such a young age. It is a choice that affects the rest of your life. I want to know what was going through her head at the exact moment she found out, that is what I would ask her if I got to go back in time and meet her.

I would also have a few things to ask my dad too. The first thing is that I don't understand how he could do this because he is a very responsible man right now. It's hard to believe that he did do it. I would also ask him about how he felt about the whole situation because he wasn't the person carrying the child; I mean he could have left my mom as a single mother if he had made that decision. He didn't though and this changed his whole life because a year after my birth they would get married. I want to ask him if his love grew stronger for my mom when he found out.

If I created a time machine, these are the things I would do. I want to know the whole story. This is a very serious subject because if it wouldn't have happened I wouldn't have been here now. I can't imagine that. All I want to do is go back in time and get the details of what everyone felt about the fact that I would soon be in this world. I would especially want to know what my mother and father felt about it.